May’s Love Letter

During my daily walk with my grandson: “You know, girls get dirtier than boys do. They do? Yeah, it’s easier and faster to get cleaned up as a boy but harder and takes a long time for a girl because they are dirtier. I don’t know about that. Who told you that?”

My daily walk with my grandson is a laboratory depiction of how beliefs are formed and how the culture indoctrinates us. Miss-information, falsehoods, lies, easily seen while interacting with a ten-year-old, harder to see in me! I am not suggesting this as a “bad” thing, only something to see and be conscious of. I so much want my beliefs to be based on evidence and a semblance of truth which is not always the case.

For a society to function, all types of myths, misinformation, propaganda, truths, explanations are passed on to our children in a sort of “cultural conditioning” or acculturation. This so-called conditioning is also deployed with adults, with added sophistication. No wonder critical thinking is such a relevant topic in today’s business and educational settings. A crucial function for individuals seeking to love authentically is the ability to think critically. Often psychological and emotional distractions get in the way.

For me, thinking critically consists of more than the so-called “objective reality” (Objects experienced through our senses). Unaware, unconscious, blind to the phenomenon, there is always more we can “see” or be conscious of in our interaction with others.  Being awake or conscious of our conditioning, brainwashing or scripting helps us see ourselves and others clearer. Additionally, it creates conditions and insights to access the energy of love for ourselves and others if we could pause, be still, pay attention and “see,” awaken!

Most of us do not question our conditioning (brainwashing?). Where did our beliefs originate from? Most people tend to operate as if beliefs are static, versus the developmental process accomplished through “seeing” clearer, easily seen in a child, more challenging seeing it in adult experiences. Seizing on an opt to love and be loved is to be able to see ourselves.

The Johari Window is a quick way to discern what might be missing in listening and caring with others (blindness) when trying to see (love) more.

The Johari Window is a technique that helps people better understand their relationship with themselves and others. It was created by psychologists Joseph Luft (1916–2014) and Harrington Ingham (1916–1995) in 1955. The concept can help individuals see clearer, resulting in a greater capacity to love.

The Johari Window

-Open Self. Information or descriptions are known to both the individual and others.

-Blind Self. Things are known by others but not to the individual.

-Hidden Self or Façade.

-Unknown Self or the Dark.

With that said, consider how have we been conditioned, brainwashed, indoctrinated, acculturation to arrive at our currents thoughts, definitions, perspectives about love? What evidence can we use to support our notion about love? How could the Johari Window Model enhance interactions with others, including a ten-year-old?